things I learned from my sister

There are certain things you learn from your siblings you can take with you for life, these are the 5 things I have learned from my sister that everyone should read….

Not Sharing Does Not Translate To Not Caring

In a sibling relationship you will always be force-fed that “sharing is caring” and yes for the most part it is but it is also “ok” not to share and it does not mean you don’t care.  You need to have that special outfit that is only yours, or time for yourself or your own space that you don’t have to share.   Being selfish with time for yourself and space as well as your own identity is not only healthy it is crucial.  Even though this lesson was learned during typical “sit in your side of the car”, “this is the line you sit on the other side” and “give my top back who said you can wear it” bickering, it is a lesson that still holds true. 

Just Because You Can’t See It Does Not Mean It’s Not There

We were not the wealthiest growing up.  We were in fact very poor.  We did not have a lot of toys and we could simply dream of having the Barbies and things we saw our friends enjoy.  This did not stop us.  We used to cut out Barbies from the catalogues that come with the newspaper and stick it on cardboard to make it stronger and used old book shelves as a Barbie “doll house”. We played like that for hours and probably had more fun than kids who just got given everything to their hearts content.  Why is this important?  Because If I don’t have projects to work on I can think up creative ideas and pitch them to my clients.  If I like something and can’t afford it I learn to make it.  If I don’t see a way forward right away, I know it’s there, I just need to figure it out but “knowing” it’s there gives me the peace, confidence and courage to try.

Speak Your Truth Even If You Are The Minority 

Something happened in our family (which I don’t want to elaborate on) and only my sister and I knew the truth.   The family tried to sweep the incident under the rug and made it out that we did not know what we were talking about given our age 6 and 7 then.  My sister and I did not budge and stood our ground and supported each other.  The truth did finally surface and even though it was many years later we did receive our apology.  If you know something is true whether it is something that actually happened or something you believe in, stand your ground.  Even if everyone else is doing and saying otherwise.  Stand tall and stand solid on that rock, your day to get your “apology” might not be now or ever but knowing you were true to what you believe in is more than enough.  

Don’t Find a Problem For Every Solution

I have never met anyone more positive thinking than my sister.  I have come to her with many problems and she always tries to “tennis” me with ideas.  

Sis:  “What about this”

Me: “mmmmm”

Sis:  “what about that”

Me: “mmmmm”

This is what I call idea tennis.  The bottom line is your first reaction to adversity should not be sitting in the corner and sulking.  It should be “go put on them tennis shoes” and start playing tennis!  Solving a problem starts with the right attitude. 

Loving Unconditionally

Ok I said no cheese but it inevitably had to get a bit cheesy.  I have been like most of us a mess at times and great at times.  I have made many mistakes, I have been unreasonable, selfish, poor, rich, famous, not famous, fat, skinny, the list goes on.  I have never had to wonder where my sister was because I knew that she was and always is two steps behind me.  Loving me unconditionally no matter what was going on at the time and I know tomorrow will be the same.  I can honestly say that having a relationship with your sister that feels like that is the most incredible privilege any girl could ask for and it is the most important lesson of them all.  

Written by Brigitte Willers
I am a working mom from Cape Town. I am passionate about fitness, all things self help and DIY. I like to figure it out and share as I go along, after all we are all just trying to figure this life out. I am all about women helping each other to excel whether its in work, play, or health and fitness. I am a qualified with the Health and Fitness Professional association, I have chosen not to use it as a career path but rather to help women achieve their goals via this blog. My work/business is Project Management in the FMCG and Entertainment Sector (www.theprojectlead.co.za) My true passion is music, nature, animals, helping others and most importantly my family. I am quite a philosophical mess (on the light side) and on a great adventure of finding my true self, like most of us (except maybe mermaids and unicorns because they know exactly who they are) Why don't you join me on this exciting journey and we can do it together, I promise I will make you laugh and you won't get bored.